Good morning readers. It’s almost here: perhaps the biggest moment in our three-year history. This week The Dispatch will launch our big campaign. People have called it crazy, bonkers, a mad-cap crusade. It simply can’t be done, they said. Well, we’re here to prove the doubters wrong.
Ok, no one has really said any of that but even absent imaginary adversaries we are buzzing with energy at Dispatch HQ. That’s not just down to caffeine consumption, it’s because our mission is clear: if we get 1,000 new subscribers over the next month, we will fulfil the five pledges below.
These pledges have been voted for by hundreds of Dispatch readers, and represent, we think, an opportunity for us to collectively make a really positive impact in this city. Stay tuned until Wednesday when we fire the starting pistol and the fun begins and we’ll explain how you can take part.
But before that, your Monday Briefing.
Catch up and coming up:
- On Wednesday, our resident history buff Jon Neale laid out what we could have won had early 20th century architect William Haywood got his way. A giant zoo and our own version of Whitehall, apparently. No 10 North eat your heart out…
- The wursts had barely started sizzling before our writers had hashed it out over the ultimate festive fight: Should the markets be hoofed out the city? We’ve sparked a fair bit of debate in the comments, have your say here.
- And at the weekend, Jack Walton walked Birmingham until his feet were blistered and bloody to try to get to the heart of the city that so many have described as the ‘capital of decline’. This one sparked a lot of interest. “It’s content like this I paid my subs for,” commented Charles.
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Photo of the week
There are cathedrals everywhere for those with eyes to see, even under Spaghetti Junction. Photo by Alexa Jones, better known as @dirtybrum.
Brum in Brief
RIP Raj’s Bouncy Bottom Burp
Stoke theme park Alton Towers has announced the immediate and permanent closure of its hit feature The World of David Walliams, presumably surprising both fans and those of us who had no idea the attraction even existed.
Opened in 2021, the ‘world’ featured popular experiences such as Gangsta Granny: The Ride and Raj’s Bouncy Bottom Burp, all based on the works of the comedian-cum-children’s author. Walliams has basked in the success of his books for over two decades, though the empire appears to be showing signs of cracking with the closure. Alton Towers’ spokesperson didn’t cite a reason for the shutdown, but said in a statement that they regularly review their offering. However, the publisher of all 23 of the author’s books, HarperCollins, announced last year that it was dropping the author following a Telegraph investigation into allegations that Walliams had behaved inappropriately towards junior female staff. He has strongly denied the allegations. If you’re particularly involved in the five-year churn of (presumably) expensive fairground rides, we want to hear from you. (The Independent).
Goodbye Grinchfest?
The Nuneaton Grinch, a local charity collector that terrorises businesses (festively) for good causes, is facing backlash online after a spate of AI images were posted to his official Facebook page. Lewd images of the Grinch making sexual jokes in Asda are among the offending lot, alongside a small inflatable boat being tugged into Hinckley by a dog — captioned “I’m seeking asylum!” Some have been quick to call him out for the content, questioning his “family friendly” persona, though others have rallied around the content creator. The George Eliot pub posted words of support, and the Grinch himself has fired back at the “snowflakes”. He operates independently, though pursuits have been sponsored by local businesses, and this year he’s collecting for North Warwickshire Community First Responders. In light of all the discourse, some have speculated that Nuneaton’s Grinchfest – backed by the Nuneaton BID – is to be cancelled, though we’re yet to see this confirmed.
New Hall traffic hell
On Friday afternoon, “thousands” of mourners lined the streets of Lindridge Road, causing another spate of traffic chaos outside New Hall Cemetery. Councillor Richard Parkin spent hours directing traffic, and residents found themselves blocked in their properties as cars were left abandoned. The issue has been ongoing for five years, since Birmingham City Council announced expansion plans of an additional 24,000 plots at the cemetery. Parkin is concerned about the impact of filling these plots, as more and more mourners are travelling from other areas of the city to bury their loved ones. Congestion over the years has led to conflict between grieving families and aggrieved residents, and despite emergency traffic measures during holidays, additional car park resurfacing and the opening of a new entrance, the situation is not yet easing. Parkin told The Dispatch he wants to see a one-way system implemented on Lindridge Road, and alternative expansion efforts elsewhere across the region. Have any thoughts about this? Get in touch.
HyperVerse hype-woman
Wolverhampton Reform councillor Susan Lawrence has been criticised for promoting the notorious HyperVerse cryptocurrency scam that cheated investors out of £1.4bn — and left some participants suicidal. The HyperVerse cryptoscheme scheme, which spread through the US and the UK from 2020 to 2022, and targeted people in developing countries across Asia, Africa and the Pacific, was described in US court documents as an alleged “fraudulent pyramid and Ponzi scheme”. Susan Lawrence was one of the most prominent UK promoters of the cryptocurrency, participating in promotional videos and webinars to market the project to the public and recruit new investors. She has not been personally accused of wrongdoing by authorities. After her involvement in the scheme she was elected to Wolverhampton city council, and now sits on the audit and risk committee which oversees financial reporting of a multimillion-pound budget. (The Guardian)
Quick Hits
🛬 Flights at Birmingham Airport have been delayed in the wake of a spate of hoax threats sent to European airports across last week. Compensation for those affected is deemed “unlikely”. (The Mirror)
🥃 Plans for canalside residential developments have been causing concern amongst heritage groups, due to their proximity to Gas Street Basin where Peaky Blinders the movie was filmed. (BBC)
🍰 A Birmingham-based drag performer is inching closer to securing the title of Great British Bake Off winner. Gabe Capes, better known as Blu Romantic, stole the star baker title last week and has victory in his sights. (Link?)
🪗 Birmingham city council is considering raising fines for breaching a public spaces protection order — that bans busking on certain city centre streets — to £500. (BBC)
Our to do list
🪩 Propel Dance, the UK’s first and only professional wheelchair dance company, are presenting seven short works at the MAC on Wednesday. Alongside their artists, local inclusive and community dance groups will join the showcase.
🛋️ What really makes a Bad Lesbian? Selina Thompson is answering just that through a “fantasy of lesbian bliss” over at Friction Arts from Thursday. It’s an exploration of the complexities of abuse, and tickets are selling fast.
🌱 Have you ever seen an advert of an obscenely happy cheesemonger and fancied yourself a more joyful life? You’re in luck – over at Birmingham Vegan Festival you can learn how to make your own raw nut cheeses. Head to Aston Student’s Union on Saturday.
🥬 Kings Norton Farmers Market is back this Sunday, bringinga litany of seasonal and local produce for your dinner tables. You simply won’t find leeks this fresh anywhere else, grab them while they’re muddy.
🍲 And if you don’t fancy cooking for yourself on Sunday, Home on the Heath is back at Kings Heath Community Centre to bring everyone together over a well-cooked meal. Join your neighbors for some great chat, great food and even-greater community.
🎸BBC Radio six presenter Emily Pilbeam heads to the Hare and Hounds in Kings Heath to hear about the diversity of sounds that have come to define Birmingham, from Black Sabbath’s heavy metal to the early 2010s B-town scene. (BBC Sounds).
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